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in Episodes on July 20, 2015 by The Mom Hour

What Does ‘Free-Range Parenting’ Really Look Like? Episode 12



We want our kids to grow up independent, resourceful, and confident. We also care about their safety. So where’s the balance between letting them go and protecting them? And what happens when our ‘risk-tolerance’ is out of synch with the neighborhood norms? Meagan and Sarah discuss all this and more in Episode 12. This is part one in a two-part series on free-range parenting – be sure to check back next week for the continuation of our discussion!

Moments from Our Week

Sometimes we give you a peek into our lives via Instagram. Here is Meagan’s crazy bathrobe from her trip to the World Domination Summit, and Sarah’s shout-out to the mental_floss piece mentioning us as a Notable Podcast!

(Love Instagram? Follow us @MeaganFrancis and @PowersOfMine, and be sure to leave a comment on one of our pics letting us know you found us through the podcast!)

Meagan Sarah Insta Collage

Links We Mentioned (Or Should Have) In This Episode

  • Lenore Sknazy’s Free Range Kids website (and book, and TV show)
  • Posts from The Happiest Home
    • 6 Ways To Encourage Free Play, Create Stronger Communities, & Raise Safer Kids
    • Parenting As Though Tomorrow Will Always Come
  • Books by Gavin de Becker
    • Protecting the Gift: Keeping Children and Teenagers Safe (and Parents Sane)
    • The Gift of Fear and Other Survival Signals that Protect Us From Violence 

Continue the conversation:
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« Your Kids Are Getting Older. Now What? Episode 11
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Comments

  1. Karen W says

    July 28, 2015 at 1:17 pm

    Great episode! My goal has always been a “free range parent” with my kids, but I do let my fears get in the way much too often. They are 3 and 6, so we are working on it daily. I want them to be independent, and this episode had some great information.

    Reply
  2. Krista says

    September 15, 2015 at 9:04 pm

    I like your definition of free range parenting, much better then the neglectful parent definition I’ve heard in ‘news’ blurbs. I can definitely relate to the blurring of irrational crowed fears and my own actual fears and trying to separate them. I want my kids to be capable and self sufficient. Great show!

    Reply
    • Sarah Powers says

      September 16, 2015 at 7:56 pm

      Krista, thank you so much for this comment! We are so glad you found this helpful!

      Reply
  3. Shannon says

    May 10, 2016 at 9:59 am

    I came across this episode after letting my 10 year old spend a good part of Saturday pretty unsupervised at a local ball park with two of her same age friends, while soccer and baseball games were going on. My anxiety can often get in the way, but my goal is for her to be fairly independent by sixth grade, so she can get herself to and from school and supervise herself until I get home. I’ve got a 4 year old too, so my 10 year old is totally my practice child as I try to stay away from helicoptering and work toward a bit of free ranging. Love your podcast!

    Reply
    • Sarah Powers says

      May 10, 2016 at 1:11 pm

      Shannon, thank you for commenting! It’s funny, I almost appreciate that anxiety sometimes, and work to live through it and still let them stretch their wings. I think it’s so great you have some goals and are working toward them. 🙂

      Reply
  4. Shasta says

    December 15, 2017 at 2:02 pm

    I know this episode is super old, but as a brand new mom (17 weeks pregnant!) I’m going through all your archives :). Around 28:10, Megan talks about a book about kids taking care of themselves- I think you’re talking about “The Girl who Owned a City” by O T Nelson. I loved this book as a teen, and I actually recently bought it just because I wanted to read it again.

    Anyways, I just wanted to mention that. I love the show!

    Reply

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New episode! Let's go deep on the fluffiest of to New episode!

Let's go deep on the fluffiest of topics: personal adornment. In today's More Than Mom episode, Meagan and Sarah share our approaches to everyday jewelry, special gifts and heirloom pieces, jewelry trends and finding our personal styles. We also talk about where we like to buy jewelry, how motherhood seasons have intersected with accessorizing phases, and what our storage wins and woes are these days.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
Two things happened to me in the past few weeks. Two things happened to me in the past few weeks. 

First, my youngest child - my baby! - turned 14.

Second, I went on a trip with said baby (Clara) and her next-older brother Owen, who’s 17, and was reminded that few experiences are quite as humbling as being a middle-aged mother outnumbered by teenaged offspring...in public.

Whereas I was once the sun they orbited around, my teens are now spinning off on their own path. It’s not they don't like me (I hope, though it can feel that way at times), it’s just that the gravitational pull around which they organize their lives has changed. 
 
I was struggling to find words for this new state of affairs, when it struck me: I’m a lame-duck parent now, counting down my last days of power while adult and nearly-adult children look eagerly ahead to whatever’s coming down the line. 

Instead of ruling like the sun to their planets or some kind of benevolent monarch, as I did when they were little, I’m more akin to a city manager who must be tolerated and placated in order to get enough budget allocated for one’s pet projects. 

After twenty-five years of organizing my time, my home, my energy and my heart around small people, the emotional shift in these not-quite-empty-nest years has been surprisingly disorienting. 

There’s a self-protective urge to rush these last four years or so of parenting minors - to check out of all this confusion and skip to the part where I claim a whole new life for myself as an empty nester and they seem to value my wisdom again (as a mom to 20-somethings I know this is also a real thing.)

But I can’t abdicate my throne just yet, friends. 

Even though my subjects often don’t see things my way, I’m still their leader…and I still have a job to do. -M

(Friends, if you like these glimpses of my life as a mom of older kids, I'd love for you to follow my personal account at @meaganfrancis! I write there regularly about midlife motherhood, raising teens, and reinventing your life after 40.) 

#parentingteens #raisingteens #lameduckparent #motherofreinvention #midlifemom #midlifemotherhood #raisingadults #parentingbigkids #momlife
I (Sarah) have been pleasantly surprised at how lo I (Sarah) have been pleasantly surprised at how long my kids have hung in when it comes to decorating Easter eggs. Not only that, but as fine motor skills and - ahem - frustration-management skills have improved for my three, the sophistication level of our egg-dyeing adventures has increased dramatically.

Click this image at the link in our bio to read more about the egg decorating kits, products, and techniques that have worked well in our house for older kids, tweens, and teens!

#eastermom #easterfamily #eggdecoratingideas #eggdyeingideas #easterwithkids #easterwithteens #craftsforteens #craftsfortweens #eggdecorating #easter2023
New episode! It's our Podcastaversary (yep, we ju New episode!

It's our Podcastaversary (yep, we just made up a new word)! Today we are celebrating eight years of The Mom Hour by reflecting on some of your most-asked questions over the years. Beyond recurring queries like "should I have that third baby?" or "what's the ideal spacing between kids?," we're digging into some deeper through-lines that point to the fears, insecurities, and hopes of our community. We also provide snapshots of the many places we have recorded our 640+ episodes (the floor, the bed, different states and more).
👇 For an episode! 👇 It's the first day of 👇 For an episode! 👇 

It's the first day of SPRING, which means we're already thinking about SUMMER. And, specifically, making our own lives as moms and home managers easier and more joyful for Summer 2023.

If you have a tip or hack that falls into the general bucket of "do this now; enjoy summer later", we'd love to hear it! We'll be sharing our own in an upcoming episode and hope to include some from listeners as well. Can be from any area of summer enjoyment from childcare to travel to self-care to home management to backyard gardening!
Hear for yourself why The Mom Hour podcast is stil Hear for yourself why The Mom Hour podcast is still going strong after eight years, 644 episodes, and more than 15 Million listens! Click the subscribe links in our bio or ask your smart speaker to "play the latest episode of The Mom Hour podcast".

New episodes release every Tuesday and alternating Sundays all year round. Our archives have conversations about every stage of parenting from before-baby through launching young adults - and every aspect of motherhood, too.

#podcast #podcastformoms #mompodcast #parentingpodcast #mommypodcast #mamapodcast #womenpodcasters #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #themomhour #motherhood
Do we call it a birthday or an anniversary? A podv Do we call it a birthday or an anniversary? A podversary? Birthcast? No matter how you slice it, The Mom Hour turns EIGHT years old on March 19!

Want to totally make our day? Leave a comment that tells us - in life milestones - how long you've been listening (i.e., "the baby I was pregnant with when I found you guys is now in kindergarten" OR "I have a middle schooler who was in preschool when I started listening" OR "I was on leave with my first when I discovered the podcast; now I have four kids!")

We appreciate this community so much - and we're not slowing down! Thanks for being here, friends. Talk to you Tuesday!

-M &S
Happy Friday! It's time for our monthly sponsor ro Happy Friday! It's time for our monthly sponsor roundup, where we thank our partners and remind you of their great deals. For our unique promo codes and links, just tap our saved "Sponsors" highlight or search the brand name on our website. Remember, when you check out our sponsors and use our links + codes, it helps support our show. Thank you!

We also collect ALL our active promo codes in our email newsletter - which is full of our latest episodes and blog posts, personal updates, community news, and more. Tap on this image at the link in our bio to subscribe today.

Shoutout to our NEW partner:
💰 @fearlessfinance ($50 off your 1st meeting!)

And welcome back . . .
⭐ @everyplate (meal kits for just $1.49 per meal!) 
⭐ @scholasticinc (books for kids of all ages!)
⭐️ @caraway_home (10% off cookware!)
⭐ @caredotcom (local, background-checked care!) 
⭐ @prepdish (2 weeks of free meal plans!)
⭐ @minted (art, bags, gifts & more!)
⭐ @chatbooks (the easiest photo books ever!)
⭐ @fabletics (2 workout bottoms for $24!)
⭐ @todoistofficial (2 mo. free of Todoist Pro!)
⭐️ @theessentialcalendar (10% off calendars!)
⭐️ @hiyahealth (50% off 1st order!)
⭐️ @kiwico_inc (50% off your 1st mo!)
⭐️ @athleticgreens (1yr of Vit.D + 5 travel packs!)
⭐️ @vionicshoes (free shipping on comfy shoes!)
It can *seem* like everybody has travel plans comi It can *seem* like everybody has travel plans coming up for Spring Break, but we know that every single year, just as many families aren't going anywhere - and that's OK, too!

This week on the blog @emilyeroark offers suggestions for mixing up your same ol' same ol' when kids are off for Spring Break. Check out the post by clicking this image at the link in our bio!

#stayathomemom #springbreakathome #staycationideas #stayathomeparent #toddlermom #preschoolmom #momofthree #springbreak2023 #spring #springbreakathome #kidsactivities
New episode! Bowling. Bonfires. The mall (no, rea New episode!

Bowling. Bonfires. The mall (no, really.) And board games (maybe?). What's fun for our families right now looks quite different than it did years ago, so today Meagan and Sarah revisit an oft-discussed hot topic on The Mom Hour: family "fun." We share several ideas for ACTUALLY FUN family activities that work for our current seasons, as well as some gripes about things that feel like they should be fun but aren't. Join us!

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast#podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast#podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
New episode! It isn't always easy to appreciate t New episode!

It isn't always easy to appreciate the mundane tasks of our daily lives, or to see the glass half-full when something goes awry. Inspired by yet another social media trend that had us scratching our heads at first (and then reflecting in spite of our forty-something selves), today Meagan and Sarah talk about situations from our own lives where we romanticized the hard stuff to get by.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
If you fill Easter baskets for your kids, do you g If you fill Easter baskets for your kids, do you give them a theme? On the blog this week @hopefulsmiles makes a case for themed Easter baskets helping to simplify shopping, avoid clutter, and stay on budget.

Check out Sandy’s ideas for themed Easter baskets by clicking this image at the link in our bio - she's got over 35 different gift ideas listed!

#easter2023 #easterbasketfillers #eastergiftideas #themedeasterbasket #giftsfortoddlers #giftsforpreschoolers #giftsfortweens #giftsforkids #eastergiftguide #eastertips #easterwithkids
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New episode! Let's go deep on the fluffiest of to New episode!

Let's go deep on the fluffiest of topics: personal adornment. In today's More Than Mom episode, Meagan and Sarah share our approaches to everyday jewelry, special gifts and heirloom pieces, jewelry trends and finding our personal styles. We also talk about where we like to buy jewelry, how motherhood seasons have intersected with accessorizing phases, and what our storage wins and woes are these days.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
Two things happened to me in the past few weeks. Two things happened to me in the past few weeks. 

First, my youngest child - my baby! - turned 14.

Second, I went on a trip with said baby (Clara) and her next-older brother Owen, who’s 17, and was reminded that few experiences are quite as humbling as being a middle-aged mother outnumbered by teenaged offspring...in public.

Whereas I was once the sun they orbited around, my teens are now spinning off on their own path. It’s not they don't like me (I hope, though it can feel that way at times), it’s just that the gravitational pull around which they organize their lives has changed. 
 
I was struggling to find words for this new state of affairs, when it struck me: I’m a lame-duck parent now, counting down my last days of power while adult and nearly-adult children look eagerly ahead to whatever’s coming down the line. 

Instead of ruling like the sun to their planets or some kind of benevolent monarch, as I did when they were little, I’m more akin to a city manager who must be tolerated and placated in order to get enough budget allocated for one’s pet projects. 

After twenty-five years of organizing my time, my home, my energy and my heart around small people, the emotional shift in these not-quite-empty-nest years has been surprisingly disorienting. 

There’s a self-protective urge to rush these last four years or so of parenting minors - to check out of all this confusion and skip to the part where I claim a whole new life for myself as an empty nester and they seem to value my wisdom again (as a mom to 20-somethings I know this is also a real thing.)

But I can’t abdicate my throne just yet, friends. 

Even though my subjects often don’t see things my way, I’m still their leader…and I still have a job to do. -M

(Friends, if you like these glimpses of my life as a mom of older kids, I'd love for you to follow my personal account at @meaganfrancis! I write there regularly about midlife motherhood, raising teens, and reinventing your life after 40.) 

#parentingteens #raisingteens #lameduckparent #motherofreinvention #midlifemom #midlifemotherhood #raisingadults #parentingbigkids #momlife
I (Sarah) have been pleasantly surprised at how lo I (Sarah) have been pleasantly surprised at how long my kids have hung in when it comes to decorating Easter eggs. Not only that, but as fine motor skills and - ahem - frustration-management skills have improved for my three, the sophistication level of our egg-dyeing adventures has increased dramatically.

Click this image at the link in our bio to read more about the egg decorating kits, products, and techniques that have worked well in our house for older kids, tweens, and teens!

#eastermom #easterfamily #eggdecoratingideas #eggdyeingideas #easterwithkids #easterwithteens #craftsforteens #craftsfortweens #eggdecorating #easter2023
New episode! It's our Podcastaversary (yep, we ju New episode!

It's our Podcastaversary (yep, we just made up a new word)! Today we are celebrating eight years of The Mom Hour by reflecting on some of your most-asked questions over the years. Beyond recurring queries like "should I have that third baby?" or "what's the ideal spacing between kids?," we're digging into some deeper through-lines that point to the fears, insecurities, and hopes of our community. We also provide snapshots of the many places we have recorded our 640+ episodes (the floor, the bed, different states and more).
👇 For an episode! 👇 It's the first day of 👇 For an episode! 👇 

It's the first day of SPRING, which means we're already thinking about SUMMER. And, specifically, making our own lives as moms and home managers easier and more joyful for Summer 2023.

If you have a tip or hack that falls into the general bucket of "do this now; enjoy summer later", we'd love to hear it! We'll be sharing our own in an upcoming episode and hope to include some from listeners as well. Can be from any area of summer enjoyment from childcare to travel to self-care to home management to backyard gardening!
Hear for yourself why The Mom Hour podcast is stil Hear for yourself why The Mom Hour podcast is still going strong after eight years, 644 episodes, and more than 15 Million listens! Click the subscribe links in our bio or ask your smart speaker to "play the latest episode of The Mom Hour podcast".

New episodes release every Tuesday and alternating Sundays all year round. Our archives have conversations about every stage of parenting from before-baby through launching young adults - and every aspect of motherhood, too.

#podcast #podcastformoms #mompodcast #parentingpodcast #mommypodcast #mamapodcast #womenpodcasters #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #themomhour #motherhood
Do we call it a birthday or an anniversary? A podv Do we call it a birthday or an anniversary? A podversary? Birthcast? No matter how you slice it, The Mom Hour turns EIGHT years old on March 19!

Want to totally make our day? Leave a comment that tells us - in life milestones - how long you've been listening (i.e., "the baby I was pregnant with when I found you guys is now in kindergarten" OR "I have a middle schooler who was in preschool when I started listening" OR "I was on leave with my first when I discovered the podcast; now I have four kids!")

We appreciate this community so much - and we're not slowing down! Thanks for being here, friends. Talk to you Tuesday!

-M &S
Happy Friday! It's time for our monthly sponsor ro Happy Friday! It's time for our monthly sponsor roundup, where we thank our partners and remind you of their great deals. For our unique promo codes and links, just tap our saved "Sponsors" highlight or search the brand name on our website. Remember, when you check out our sponsors and use our links + codes, it helps support our show. Thank you!

We also collect ALL our active promo codes in our email newsletter - which is full of our latest episodes and blog posts, personal updates, community news, and more. Tap on this image at the link in our bio to subscribe today.

Shoutout to our NEW partner:
💰 @fearlessfinance ($50 off your 1st meeting!)

And welcome back . . .
⭐ @everyplate (meal kits for just $1.49 per meal!) 
⭐ @scholasticinc (books for kids of all ages!)
⭐️ @caraway_home (10% off cookware!)
⭐ @caredotcom (local, background-checked care!) 
⭐ @prepdish (2 weeks of free meal plans!)
⭐ @minted (art, bags, gifts & more!)
⭐ @chatbooks (the easiest photo books ever!)
⭐ @fabletics (2 workout bottoms for $24!)
⭐ @todoistofficial (2 mo. free of Todoist Pro!)
⭐️ @theessentialcalendar (10% off calendars!)
⭐️ @hiyahealth (50% off 1st order!)
⭐️ @kiwico_inc (50% off your 1st mo!)
⭐️ @athleticgreens (1yr of Vit.D + 5 travel packs!)
⭐️ @vionicshoes (free shipping on comfy shoes!)
It can *seem* like everybody has travel plans comi It can *seem* like everybody has travel plans coming up for Spring Break, but we know that every single year, just as many families aren't going anywhere - and that's OK, too!

This week on the blog @emilyeroark offers suggestions for mixing up your same ol' same ol' when kids are off for Spring Break. Check out the post by clicking this image at the link in our bio!

#stayathomemom #springbreakathome #staycationideas #stayathomeparent #toddlermom #preschoolmom #momofthree #springbreak2023 #spring #springbreakathome #kidsactivities
New episode! Bowling. Bonfires. The mall (no, rea New episode!

Bowling. Bonfires. The mall (no, really.) And board games (maybe?). What's fun for our families right now looks quite different than it did years ago, so today Meagan and Sarah revisit an oft-discussed hot topic on The Mom Hour: family "fun." We share several ideas for ACTUALLY FUN family activities that work for our current seasons, as well as some gripes about things that feel like they should be fun but aren't. Join us!

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast#podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast#podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts

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