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in Blog on December 8, 2020 by Meagan Francis

Meagan’s Holiday Help, Day 8: Embrace messy making.

All month long, I’ll be sharing daily pick-me-ups, tips, and doses of inspiration to help us all find perspective during the month of December. We invite you to check back daily for these mini pep-talks as we prepare for a very unusual holiday season. –Meagan

For as long as I can remember, I have had a fascination with embroidery and needlework. An embroidered farm scene hung above my bed when I was very small; I remember standing on my bed at the age of three or four, tracing the threads with my fingers. My mother’s pillowcases were embroidered with pink and red roses with pale green stems. When I was sick and got to stay home from school, tucked up in her bed with the TV, I would stare at those pillowcases for hours, wondering how they were made.

But it took me a good fifteen years of adulthood before I gave embroidery a whirl for myself. And even then, I took it up in fits and starts, leaving several rather ambitious projects unfinished. This year, I was determined to finally pull it off, and gathered together all the needles and thread, patterns, and motivation – a gift list and a Christmas deadline – I’d need to finally crank out some finished works.

The first one? The embroidered bear you see above, stitched on a flour-sack towel. Such a simple design came together quickly; I finished the whole thing in around an hour. And to make it even more meaningful, as I was still waiting on my new embroidery floss to show up, I remembered that I’ve been carrying my mom’s around in a tin for the last 21 years. Her brown, green, and variegated yellow threads were perfect for the job. I was pretty satisfied with the finished project when I set it down.

But soon after, I started noticing little…problems. Like that line across Mr. Bear’s muzzle. It looks out of place to me. Is he a circus bear? Maybe I should have done it in a lighter color. And those flower details on the arrows? Those abstract “sunflowers” don’t look anything like the multi-petaled daisies I was supposed to stitch. While we’re discussing those arrows, anyone else notice that one of them is pointy and the other rounded? And don’t even get me started on the hot mess that is the knotty back side of the towel..

If you thought you could just glance at this and think “cute bear”, boy, were you wrong! There are myriad errors I can point out to ruin your experience of it. Shall I keep going? I have material for days!

In all seriousness, though, isn’t it funny how we do this to ourselves? Whereas I could focus on the positives – wow I MADE this with my HANDS – instead it’s only to easy to see the flaws first. And instead of giving it to someone I love, a little part of me wants to hide it away in a drawer and take up a new hobby, perhaps something that doesn’t involve following patterns or tying neat knots.

But here’s the thing: I really enjoy embroidery. My approach may be more “bull in the china shop” than “delicate and painstaking” but hey, I’m having fun, I’m learning as I go, and finding that my goal of giving handmade Christmas gifts is doable…as long as I don’t add the word “perfect” or “like store bought” to the description.

Over the past two weeks I’ve finished stitching designs on two more towels, two pillowcases, and the cover of a heating pad. I’ve learned a lot in the interim, too: how to create my own patterns and transfer them to fabric, how to keep the back neater as you stitch, how to thread the needle without having a panic attack (most of the time), and how to fix mistakes as I go.

It takes time to learn how to do things, and it takes even more time to learn how to do them well. (And if you involve your kids in making things, your finished projects will likely never be magazine-page perfect.) But isn’t that what makes them charming, heartfelt, and totally unique? Imperfect as it may be, that first – or fifteenth – messy attempt is worth giving as a gift, hanging up, or displaying in the middle of the table.

As for myself? I’m glad I finally picked up needle and thread and kept at it long enough to finish something – several things, actually. And I’m proud that I’ll be able to give some of the results of that hard work away this holiday.

Including magically messy Mr. Bear.

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Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: Holiday Help 2020

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« Meagan’s Holiday Help, Day 7: Plan to finish what you started.
Letting Go of Perfect-Holiday-Mom Pressure (For Real This Time): Episode 290 »

Comments

  1. Lauren says

    December 9, 2020 at 10:35 am

    I think he is adorable and yes, we should be kind to our growing selves!

    Reply
  2. Michele says

    December 9, 2020 at 7:15 pm

    I bet that whoever gets Mr. Bear is going to love him! When I was 7, I cross-stitched a design of a cardinal for my grandma, and my mom sewed it into a throw pillow. Even though the bird definitely looked like it was created by a second-grader, that pillow sat on my grandma’s couch for almost three decades. I think she liked the imperfections, and thinking about my tiny little self working so hard on it, and I bet whoever gets Mr. Bear will feel the same, even though it doesn’t look like a machine made it. 🙂

    Reply

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It doesn't tell you about the confusion and loneliness in the aftermath of my divorce six+ years ago.

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(Pssst: they even have a Disney collection!)

Click this image at the link in our bio to get:
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New episode! Big black trash bag energy is in ful New episode!

Big black trash bag energy is in full effect over here! In this episode Sarah is joined by contributor @cafedumartin for a conversation about how, why and what we are getting rid of this January. We talk strategic home resets, major junk-hauling, and tips for ongoing clutter maintenance. And while on the surface this episode is about physical stuff, we also acknowledge the emotional complexity that surrounds getting rid of stuff.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
This recent picture of Eric and I adventuring in t This recent picture of Eric and I adventuring in the snow, well into our third year of dating, captures so much. 

But there's a lot it doesn't tell you, too. 

It doesn't tell you about the heartbreaking experience of watching my former marriage dissolve.

It doesn't tell you about the confusion and loneliness in the aftermath of my divorce six+ years ago.

It doesn't tell you about the time that, while driving home in the dark on a snowy evening, I reflected on the fact that nobody was expecting me to check in with them that night - that if I skidded into a ditch nobody would think to look for me for days.

It doesn't tell you about the twenty-five - yes, TWENTY-FIVE - first dates I went on prior to meeting Eric (the vast majority of those never turned into a second date.)

It doesn't tell you about the disappointments and doubts and tears leading up to finding my person.

And...

It also doesn't tell you about how much I (grudgingly) grew during that period of singleness. 

The strength and resourcefulness I discovered through having the space to run a household on my own and determine my own path in life. 

The peacefulness of a home run under my own steam, its rhythms based on my own values and priorities. 

The joy (and necessity) of getting back in touch with myself.

If you’re single and looking, I really do hope you find your person soon. I am so grateful for having found mine, and I know how hard it is to hear "your time will come, too" when you see no evidence of that on the horizon. (Especially going into February, right?)

But while you're waiting, there's another person (you) who deserves your attention...

and hard as it may be to see when you’re in the thick of doubt and disappointment…

that person is enough.
Looking for unique classroom valentines *and* a gr Looking for unique classroom valentines *and* a great deal? We love everything about @minted, from the high-quality paper and printing, to the ability to buy unique designs, freshly sourced from a community of independent artists. And right now, Minted has great deals on all things Valentine's Day!

(Pssst: they even have a Disney collection!)

Click this image at the link in our bio to get:
🎒 20% off Valentine photo cards, & classroom Valentines
🎁 20% off photo & stationery gifts on orders $250+
💕 15% off ALL orders with code BEMINE23.
🗓️ Sale ends Monday 1/30!

The Mom Hour is part of Minted's affiliate program, which means if you shop our links we'll earn a small commission at no additional cost to you. Thank you!
Here’s your January reminder to save shoeboxes f Here’s your January reminder to save shoeboxes for February and March classroom projects! Valentine boxes and leprechaun traps are around the corner, and shoe boxes are so much harder to come by these days. Consider this a friendly head’s up from a mom who’s been there.

Want more help and tips, plus reassurance that you’re doing a great job? (You are.) Search for The Mom Hour in your favorite podcast app and hit subscribe!

#kindergarten #firstgrade #valentinebox #leprechauntrap #shoeboxcraft #roomparent #roommom #classroomvalentines #parenting #momlife #parentingtip #tipsformoms
Looking to implement daily "quiet time" for presch Looking to implement daily "quiet time" for preschoolers? Even for kids who want to GO GO GO all day long, having a built-in pause in the day can help develop independent play skills, encourage rest, and - of course - give caregivers a chance to reset as well.

Since this week's podcast episode is all about kids and alone time, we thought we'd revisit this resource on the blog by Sandy Hsu:

👉 How To Encourage Independence In Preschoolers With A “Quiet Time” Routine. 👈 

Sandy (@hopefulsmiles) give tips for implementing a successful quiet time routine AND rounds up products and activities that help make independent play more likely - even in young preschoolers. Check it out by clicking this image at the link in our bio!

#quiettime #parentingtoddlers #parentingpreschoolers #momoflittles #stayathomemom #stayathomeparent #activitiesforpreschoolers #activitiesfortoddlers #threeyearolds #fouryearolds #fiveyearolds #momlife #sahm #sahmlife
New episode! Does solitude come naturally to your New episode!

Does solitude come naturally to your kids, or are moments of solo play far and few between? Meagan and Sarah read some research recently that challenged us to think about the importance of alone time, and whether our kids get enough. In this episode, we dive into our own childhood memories, how our children embrace (or run from) solitude, and how challenging it is to find that just-right balance. Join us! 

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
New episode! With all the day-to-day planning requ New episode! With all the day-to-day planning required to run a household, it's easy to put longterm planning on the back burner. Today Meagan and Sarah share lessons we've learned (or are still learning) that help us look ahead at a whole year, quarter, or month at a time. From knowing ourselves and our seasonal rhythms to figuring out where they keep next year's school calendar, we've picked up a few things over the years, and we're ready to dive in for 2023. Join us! 

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
Happy Saturday! Been meaning to check out a deal y Happy Saturday! Been meaning to check out a deal you heard on our podcast? You're in luck because here's our sponsor roundup for January. Once a month, we use this space to thank our partners and remind you of their special offers. For our special promo codes and links, just tap our saved "Sponsors" highlight or search the brand name on our website. And when you do check out our sponsors + use our links and codes, it helps support our show! We also collect ALL our active promo codes in our email newsletter - which is full of our latest episodes and blog posts, personal updates, community news, and more. Tap on this image at the link in our bio to subscribe today.

Shoutout to our NEW sponsors:
🍳 @caraway_home (10% off gorgeous, non-toxic cookware!)
💪 @futurefitapp (risk-free trial of 1-on-1 personal training!)
🔪 @prepdish (2 weeks free of healthy, prep-ahead meal plans!)
🎨 @minted (design marketplace with art, bags, gifts & more!)
📚 @chatbooks (deals on the easiest photo books ever!)
😍 @fabletics (2 stylish workout bottoms for $24!)

And welcome back . . . 
⭐️ @stitchfix ($20 off your 1st purchase!)
⭐️ @theessentialcalendar (10% off full-season calendars!)
⭐️ @hiyahealth (50% off 1st order!)
⭐️ @kiwico_inc (50% off your 1st mo!)
⭐️ @athleticgreens (1yr of Vit.D + 5 travel packs!)
⭐️ @vionicshoes (free shipping on cute, comfy shoes!)
Braces on, braces off. First phones, driver's ed, Braces on, braces off. First phones, driver's ed, high school registration. As we discussed in this week's episode, we still get all the feels when older kids meet cultural or developmental milestones - even if they cringe when we celebrate and share.

Would love to hear what you're celebrating about your older kids! Everything from learning a new skill to blossoming independence - leave us a comment! 

PS - Listen to the episode in your favorite podcast app, or by clicking this image at the link in our bio!

#parenting #parentingbigkids #parentingteens #parentingtweens #bigkidmilestone #teenagers #tweens #momoftweens #momofteens #momofteenagers
Turns out, when your last baby approaches double-d Turns out, when your last baby approaches double-digits, you find yourself staring a different milestone right in the (puffy) face:

It's been a decade since I was pregnant for the last time. 

This photo was taken the morning of my scheduled c-section, just a few hours before we'd meet our third and last babe. It's hard to remember, but I'm SURE I was ready to be done. Constant braxton-hicks, heartburn I hadn't experienced with the other two, food aversions that lasted the whole 39w5d, and physical exhaustion trying to keep up with a 2- and 4-year old: all part of an otherwise uncomplicated pregnancy, but still nobody's idea of easy.

I don't miss it - being pregnant. Grateful to have had the experience, absolutely. But I've never really pined for another go-around, at least not seriously. Still, a whole decade removed feels as significant a milestone to me as does the notion that that double-dimpled babe will blow out ten candles this weekend.

Time, like, whoa. 

-Sarah

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