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in Episodes on June 7, 2017 by The Mom Hour

Stay At Home, Work Full-Time, Or Something In Between? Episode 105

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Subscribe: Google Podcasts | Spotify | Stitcher | TuneIn | RSS

Are you totally satisfied with your work/mom balance? Turns out, a lot of you are. But when we asked listeners to weigh in on this question, two-thirds said they either wished they could be home more (or work in a more flexible way) OR that they were home but wished they could find some fulfillment or income outside the home.

Episode 105 is about finding satisfaction in your situation, whatever it is, and also how to take baby steps toward a different one if it feels like it’s time. We cover staying at home full-time, working outside the home, freelancing and part-time work, and everything in between. And, as always, we’re here to tell you that no matter what your choice and how you feel about it, it’s totally okay.

Sponsor Spotlight

Telling family stories is a huge part of the culture in both Meagan’s and Sarah’s families, so we are loving what StoryWorth does to help families preserve and share their stories. When you gift a subscription your family member receives weekly emails with questions to prompt a memory of a story, and at the end of the year their stories are bound into a beautiful book.

Podcast listeners can save $20 off a StoryWorth subscription by visiting storyworth.com/themomhour.

Links we mentioned (or should have) in Episode 105

  • Give the Life, Listened social channels some love! We’re on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram
  • 10 Signs You Might Be a Work-Anywhere-Possible-Mom (WAPM) (Sarah’s tongue-in-cheek post for City Mom Blog)
  • Keep scrolling for the social media polls we mentioned (or click here to see the Facebook conversation, and here for the one on Instagram)

 

 

Prepping for an episode and would love your input. Which best describes you? Thanks, friends!

A post shared by The Mom Hour (@themomhour) on May 25, 2017 at 12:26pm PDT

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Filed Under: Episodes Tagged With: mom confidence, self, stay at home mom, working mom

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« Self-Care As Self-Preservation: Episode 104
Happy Loud Life with Jill Krause: Voices 14 »

Comments

  1. Avery Raley says

    June 6, 2017 at 8:49 pm

    Every time I think I’ve heard the “best” episode you guys have put out, you surprise me with another one that blows me away! I was so encouraged by this episode I just had to let you guys know. I was honestly a little nervous to hit play on this one because, while I’m currently content in my role as a stay at home mom, I thought there was a possibility that after listening I might feel guilty or like I should be doing something extra on the side. SHAME on me for not knowing you guys better than that. What I actually feel is SO encouraged and empowered in my current role and INSPIRED for the future and with the ideas of things I may want to take on when the time is right.

    I’m going on year 4 of being at home, and about a year ago I opened an Etsy shop (both as a creative outlet and something that could possibly bring in a few extra dollars) but recently put it on an indefinite hold because I got overwhelmed feeling like I couldn’t keep up and I was really bad at juggling. Probably because I tried to open it while I was pregnant and then keep it going with a newborn (why?). I sometimes think about it and feel like I failed or that I’ll never be able to open it again and actually do it well and follow through with the dreams I originally had for it. BUT with this episode you two really helped me both feel content in NOT needing to have anything aside from my role as Mommy but also feel excited about a future season where maybe I’ll have more time to develop those ideas and it’s okay if it takes a long time to get anywhere and it’s okay if that time isn’t now. Okay, longest comment ever. To sum up my thoughts, THANK YOU for your awesome insight. I’m constantly impressed with you both and I can’t get enough of this podcast!

    Reply
    • Sarah Powers says

      June 7, 2017 at 10:22 am

      Avery, this comment MADE MY DAY. Thank you so much for taking the time to write it. We so appreciate your support of the show.

      Reply
  2. Leslie M says

    June 7, 2017 at 6:38 pm

    This episode is right on time! 12 weeks after I had my son, I returned to my full time job and I hated it. The pay was excellent but my mental health couldn’t handle it. I quit 5 months later and stayed home for 4 months. I’ve been working part time for the last two months and it’s working out for now. I hope to return to full time work but I’m trying to go with the flow.

    Reply
  3. Krista says

    August 14, 2017 at 11:43 am

    You guys hit the nail on the head for me. I’m a SAHM and have always felt the pressure to be a Boss Mom or that any steps I take towards a dream has to be followed by income or in the pursuit of income. So much so that I’m left feeling frozen in place. Thanks so much for touching on this. This is the first time I’ve heard anyone mention this hidden pressure. I actually teared up realizing that was where I’m at.

    Reply

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Top 10 parenting podcast hosted by @meaganfrancis (MI) & @powersofmine (SoCal). 8 kids between us, little to grown. Happier motherhood starts here.

The Mom Hour
New episode! "How do you know when your family is New episode!

"How do you know when your family is complete?" is one of the most common listener questions we receive. Meagan and Sarah both now have several years of hindsight separating them from the baby and toddler years, and today we're reflecting on the idea of a "complete" family unit. We acknowledge that it doesn't necessarily look like what we imagined it would - and that for many moms there is uncertainty and even grief wrapped up in all of this - but we also find much to celebrate about the current and future states of our proverbial "family tables".

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
We're signing off for the long weekend, friends. W We're signing off for the long weekend, friends. We'll be back Tuesday with a new episode, and in the meantime we send you all the good vibes for stress-free celebrations and exactly the type of holiday weekend you have the bandwidth for. Parades optional (IYKYK). Sending love, and we’ll talk to you next week. -M & S
Wise words from @meaganfrancis - written 10+ years Wise words from @meaganfrancis - written 10+ years ago when she had a houseful of little kids and a full-time career. On the podcast this week we talk about making peace with the endlessness that is managing a family home - have you listened? Click this image at the link in our bio to visit the show notes, where you can click play to hear our discussion, as well as find the link to this original blog post. 💛
It’s 5:55 a.m., and my notebook is filled with w It’s 5:55 a.m., and my notebook is filled with words I’ve scratched out since 5:00. I have five minutes until I need to wake the big kids up for school. Taking one last sip of my cold coffee, I stretch my arms above my head, then walk down the hall. The house is still clean, but soon, tiny feet will hit the floor, and the work of parenting and running a household will begin again.

I gently open the kids’ bedroom door and stand on the bottom bunk, reaching my hand into the top bunk to place it on Rhett’s head. His breath is slow and steady; he’s still deep asleep. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath, preparing myself for the day ahead. 

Opening my eyes, I tickle his head, “Hey buddy, it’s time to get up,” I whisper. “I’ve got breakfast on the table.”

“It’s so early,” he grumbles, curling into a ball. 

“I know, but it’s time,” I say, anticipating what he will say next.

“Can you carry me?” he asks. 

I start to protest; that he’s too heavy and big enough to do it by himself. But I pause, knowing he’s asking me to step back a bit—that he hasn’t made the jump to a “big kid” just yet. And maybe, while there aren’t three easy steps to parenting, he’s reminding me I can do this—one step at a time.

--

✨ Read @stacybronec's essay by clicking this image at the link in our bio. ✨
New episode! Not feeling like an expert in the ho New episode!

Not feeling like an expert in the housework realm? Turns out, very few of feel like we know what we are doing. Last week Meagan and Sarah talked about WHAT we do to keep our households in a state of "good enough," and this week's Part Two is all about the feelings that came up as we tracked a week of real-life housework. We dive into some of our insecurities as home managers, the difference between housework and mothering, and some of the really sticky aspects of finding your identity as a mom and homemaker in the 21st century. We have LOTs of thoughts - and we hope you'll join us!

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #housework #reallifehousework #feelings #homemanagerinsecurities #momin21stcentury
This is me, at the age of 20. In over my head, lea This is me, at the age of 20. In over my head, learning to mother a sweet but mystifying baby boy while most of my friends were in the middle of their junior year of college. I had a stubborn optimistic streak and a supportive family in my corner, but not much else.

When I look at the girl I was then, I'm so glad that optimism won out and that Jacob is here today. Motherhood was a life-altering experience that shaped everything about the person I became.

But when I think about the lack of practical and active societal support that girl and her baby received nearly twenty-five years ago, I'm sad and angry. What (inadequate) assistance was offered came tinged with a sense of failure and shame. And the movement working tirelessly to protect the rights of my unborn baby largely seemed to ignore my personhood except as a means to keep him alive.

Even for the much more privileged, it's a tough time to be a mother. The needs of moms (and by extension, living children) are ignored, and we all pay the price.

At The Mom Hour, we are Pro-Mom. We value our entire community and celebrate that this group represents a diverse set of backgrounds and beliefs. Our goal is to always be part of a dynamic and inclusive conversation, not an echo chamber or soapbox.

We also believe that mothers have immense value in their own right, not merely as a vessel for new life, or the means by which to kept that life fed, warm, clean, disciplined, entertained, and educated for the next 18+ years. Motherhood is not a consequence or a political tool. Mothers should not be the collateral damage of other people's beliefs. We are important, worthy of consideration, and worthy of care.

When I look back at the girl in this picture, I wish I'd known how valuable I was: not just for what I could do for the baby on my hip, but simply because I existed. 

I hope you all know it now, and that it colors not only the way you treat yourself but the way you treat other moms.

Because we all deserve it, and now more than ever, we need each other.-M

p.s.: I wrote about the origins of belief and the benefits of challenging them over at @meaganfrancis today. Would love to hear your thoughts.
New episode! What we remember from childhood help New episode!

What we remember from childhood helps build our narrative of who we were - even if those memories are fuzzy or slightly flawed. Today Meagan and Sarah get in the way-WAY-back machine and reflect on what we were like as kids and teens. As a child, Meagan was dreamy, imaginative, chatty, and obsessed with balloons (!!), while Sarah was studious, quiet-but-sociable, responsible, and circumstantially prone to tears. We touch on how our personalities developed as we grew up, whether we were “popular” or not, and if we felt clueless or confident come high school. Join us for this fun More Than Mom to get a glimpse into our growing up years (at least the way we remember it!).

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #growingup #childhoodmemories #memories
The Powers family is road-tripping this weekend, a The Powers family is road-tripping this weekend, and I (Sarah) wanted to share two things:

1️⃣ In Episode 365 we shared listeners’ best family travel tips, and so many moms talked about stocking up on snacks (you can’t have too many, they said!). ONE listener shared that their family does the opposite: bring almost zero snacks so that kids are plenty hungry when it’s time to stop, and so that those gas station purchases seem even more special. We tried the latter today and it worked GREAT for my kids. We had some very uninteresting, nutritious snacks in the car, and then we let them each pick two things from our first convenience store stop. They were THRILLED, and I didn’t overbuy on stuff nobody wanted.

💡 Takeaway: Sometimes the opposite of what everyone else is doing is right for you! 

2️⃣ Meagan and I made a conscious decision last year to move away from recommending Amazon (and profiting from those recommendations) as the solution for *everything*. It’s not a boycott at all - just a gentle redirection  of our influence toward small, local, or even just *different* retailers. In my personal life, I have moved away from Amazon for almost all recurring everyday essentials, and it has felt right for me. HOWEVER: When stocking up for a road trip, bless the everything store and Jeff B take all my money. These seatback caddies with touch screens for iPads are cheap and may not last beyond this trip but they’re working GREAT.

💡 Takeaway: The 80/20 rule is a-OK. If you need permission to break your own rules, consider this it.

Safe travels, friends. ♥️
One of our most popular blog posts EVER is refresh One of our most popular blog posts EVER is refreshed for 2022! Click this image at the link in our bio to read the just-structured-enough approach Sarah took during those long AZ summers at home when her kids were 6, 4, and 1.5. 😎 

#stayathomemom #preschoolers #summermomlife #arizonasummer #summerschedulefortoddlers #summerscheduledforpreschoolers #samplesummerschedule #summerdaysathom
How To Organize End-Of-School Artwork & Papers

✏️ Stop looking for the perfect system.
✏️ Don't overthink it.
✏️ Remember that you have all summer. Or maybe it's a fall project.
✏️ It's fine. You're doing fine. Everything will be just fine.

This week on the podcast I talked about these accordion portfolios from Lakeshore Learning (no brand relationship whatsoever) that I use for keepsake papers and art. I also said - and it bears repeating - ANY OLD BIN WORKS TOO. It's not about the vehicle, friends.

I also shared that while Meagan and I tracked our home management tasks the week of May 31 and I mentioned *starting* this process that week, by the time we recorded on June 16 my end-of-school paper piles were alive and well and still not put away. I can now report that we leave for a week on Saturday and I can GUARANTEE it won't be done before then. So best-case = July at this point.

Do you have specific questions for me about storing End Of School (or anytime) kids' keepsake art and papers? I'll pop into stories today and take some questions if it would be helpful. I can promise most of my answers will be a version of "don't overthink it, it's all going to be okay" BUT I am happy to use my decade+ of school parenting to share experience if it helps.

Happy Summer, all. You're doing great.
New episode! Most of us enjoy having a clean and New episode!

Most of us enjoy having a clean and tidy home, but have you ever kept track of how much you do throughout the week to keep it that way? In today’s episode, Meagan and Sarah share what seven days of real-life housework looks like in our homes. We reflect on the tasks we knew went into running a home, and some surprising ones we never thought of as housework before (like picking plums and chasing chickens!). Whether you prioritize deep-cleaning on a regular schedule or tend to tidy as you go and hope for the best, it’s eye-opening and gratifying to acknowledge the work that goes into managing a home full of kids.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #endlesscleaning #housework #cleaning #tidyingup #
Math Quiz: If 3 kids dirty an average of 15 dishes Math Quiz: If 3 kids dirty an average of 15 dishes per day while away at school 7 hours per day, how many additional dishes will they dirty while home all day for summer break?

67. The answer is 67. Yes, I’ve checked my work! Maybe someone who passed calculus can explain? 🤪 -M

#mommath #drowningindishes #summerbreakisnotreallyabreak
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looking for something?

New episode! "How do you know when your family is New episode!

"How do you know when your family is complete?" is one of the most common listener questions we receive. Meagan and Sarah both now have several years of hindsight separating them from the baby and toddler years, and today we're reflecting on the idea of a "complete" family unit. We acknowledge that it doesn't necessarily look like what we imagined it would - and that for many moms there is uncertainty and even grief wrapped up in all of this - but we also find much to celebrate about the current and future states of our proverbial "family tables".

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts
We're signing off for the long weekend, friends. W We're signing off for the long weekend, friends. We'll be back Tuesday with a new episode, and in the meantime we send you all the good vibes for stress-free celebrations and exactly the type of holiday weekend you have the bandwidth for. Parades optional (IYKYK). Sending love, and we’ll talk to you next week. -M & S
Wise words from @meaganfrancis - written 10+ years Wise words from @meaganfrancis - written 10+ years ago when she had a houseful of little kids and a full-time career. On the podcast this week we talk about making peace with the endlessness that is managing a family home - have you listened? Click this image at the link in our bio to visit the show notes, where you can click play to hear our discussion, as well as find the link to this original blog post. 💛
It’s 5:55 a.m., and my notebook is filled with w It’s 5:55 a.m., and my notebook is filled with words I’ve scratched out since 5:00. I have five minutes until I need to wake the big kids up for school. Taking one last sip of my cold coffee, I stretch my arms above my head, then walk down the hall. The house is still clean, but soon, tiny feet will hit the floor, and the work of parenting and running a household will begin again.

I gently open the kids’ bedroom door and stand on the bottom bunk, reaching my hand into the top bunk to place it on Rhett’s head. His breath is slow and steady; he’s still deep asleep. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath, preparing myself for the day ahead. 

Opening my eyes, I tickle his head, “Hey buddy, it’s time to get up,” I whisper. “I’ve got breakfast on the table.”

“It’s so early,” he grumbles, curling into a ball. 

“I know, but it’s time,” I say, anticipating what he will say next.

“Can you carry me?” he asks. 

I start to protest; that he’s too heavy and big enough to do it by himself. But I pause, knowing he’s asking me to step back a bit—that he hasn’t made the jump to a “big kid” just yet. And maybe, while there aren’t three easy steps to parenting, he’s reminding me I can do this—one step at a time.

--

✨ Read @stacybronec's essay by clicking this image at the link in our bio. ✨
New episode! Not feeling like an expert in the ho New episode!

Not feeling like an expert in the housework realm? Turns out, very few of feel like we know what we are doing. Last week Meagan and Sarah talked about WHAT we do to keep our households in a state of "good enough," and this week's Part Two is all about the feelings that came up as we tracked a week of real-life housework. We dive into some of our insecurities as home managers, the difference between housework and mothering, and some of the really sticky aspects of finding your identity as a mom and homemaker in the 21st century. We have LOTs of thoughts - and we hope you'll join us!

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #housework #reallifehousework #feelings #homemanagerinsecurities #momin21stcentury
This is me, at the age of 20. In over my head, lea This is me, at the age of 20. In over my head, learning to mother a sweet but mystifying baby boy while most of my friends were in the middle of their junior year of college. I had a stubborn optimistic streak and a supportive family in my corner, but not much else.

When I look at the girl I was then, I'm so glad that optimism won out and that Jacob is here today. Motherhood was a life-altering experience that shaped everything about the person I became.

But when I think about the lack of practical and active societal support that girl and her baby received nearly twenty-five years ago, I'm sad and angry. What (inadequate) assistance was offered came tinged with a sense of failure and shame. And the movement working tirelessly to protect the rights of my unborn baby largely seemed to ignore my personhood except as a means to keep him alive.

Even for the much more privileged, it's a tough time to be a mother. The needs of moms (and by extension, living children) are ignored, and we all pay the price.

At The Mom Hour, we are Pro-Mom. We value our entire community and celebrate that this group represents a diverse set of backgrounds and beliefs. Our goal is to always be part of a dynamic and inclusive conversation, not an echo chamber or soapbox.

We also believe that mothers have immense value in their own right, not merely as a vessel for new life, or the means by which to kept that life fed, warm, clean, disciplined, entertained, and educated for the next 18+ years. Motherhood is not a consequence or a political tool. Mothers should not be the collateral damage of other people's beliefs. We are important, worthy of consideration, and worthy of care.

When I look back at the girl in this picture, I wish I'd known how valuable I was: not just for what I could do for the baby on my hip, but simply because I existed. 

I hope you all know it now, and that it colors not only the way you treat yourself but the way you treat other moms.

Because we all deserve it, and now more than ever, we need each other.-M

p.s.: I wrote about the origins of belief and the benefits of challenging them over at @meaganfrancis today. Would love to hear your thoughts.
New episode! What we remember from childhood help New episode!

What we remember from childhood helps build our narrative of who we were - even if those memories are fuzzy or slightly flawed. Today Meagan and Sarah get in the way-WAY-back machine and reflect on what we were like as kids and teens. As a child, Meagan was dreamy, imaginative, chatty, and obsessed with balloons (!!), while Sarah was studious, quiet-but-sociable, responsible, and circumstantially prone to tears. We touch on how our personalities developed as we grew up, whether we were “popular” or not, and if we felt clueless or confident come high school. Join us for this fun More Than Mom to get a glimpse into our growing up years (at least the way we remember it!).

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #growingup #childhoodmemories #memories
The Powers family is road-tripping this weekend, a The Powers family is road-tripping this weekend, and I (Sarah) wanted to share two things:

1️⃣ In Episode 365 we shared listeners’ best family travel tips, and so many moms talked about stocking up on snacks (you can’t have too many, they said!). ONE listener shared that their family does the opposite: bring almost zero snacks so that kids are plenty hungry when it’s time to stop, and so that those gas station purchases seem even more special. We tried the latter today and it worked GREAT for my kids. We had some very uninteresting, nutritious snacks in the car, and then we let them each pick two things from our first convenience store stop. They were THRILLED, and I didn’t overbuy on stuff nobody wanted.

💡 Takeaway: Sometimes the opposite of what everyone else is doing is right for you! 

2️⃣ Meagan and I made a conscious decision last year to move away from recommending Amazon (and profiting from those recommendations) as the solution for *everything*. It’s not a boycott at all - just a gentle redirection  of our influence toward small, local, or even just *different* retailers. In my personal life, I have moved away from Amazon for almost all recurring everyday essentials, and it has felt right for me. HOWEVER: When stocking up for a road trip, bless the everything store and Jeff B take all my money. These seatback caddies with touch screens for iPads are cheap and may not last beyond this trip but they’re working GREAT.

💡 Takeaway: The 80/20 rule is a-OK. If you need permission to break your own rules, consider this it.

Safe travels, friends. ♥️
One of our most popular blog posts EVER is refresh One of our most popular blog posts EVER is refreshed for 2022! Click this image at the link in our bio to read the just-structured-enough approach Sarah took during those long AZ summers at home when her kids were 6, 4, and 1.5. 😎 

#stayathomemom #preschoolers #summermomlife #arizonasummer #summerschedulefortoddlers #summerscheduledforpreschoolers #samplesummerschedule #summerdaysathom
How To Organize End-Of-School Artwork & Papers

✏️ Stop looking for the perfect system.
✏️ Don't overthink it.
✏️ Remember that you have all summer. Or maybe it's a fall project.
✏️ It's fine. You're doing fine. Everything will be just fine.

This week on the podcast I talked about these accordion portfolios from Lakeshore Learning (no brand relationship whatsoever) that I use for keepsake papers and art. I also said - and it bears repeating - ANY OLD BIN WORKS TOO. It's not about the vehicle, friends.

I also shared that while Meagan and I tracked our home management tasks the week of May 31 and I mentioned *starting* this process that week, by the time we recorded on June 16 my end-of-school paper piles were alive and well and still not put away. I can now report that we leave for a week on Saturday and I can GUARANTEE it won't be done before then. So best-case = July at this point.

Do you have specific questions for me about storing End Of School (or anytime) kids' keepsake art and papers? I'll pop into stories today and take some questions if it would be helpful. I can promise most of my answers will be a version of "don't overthink it, it's all going to be okay" BUT I am happy to use my decade+ of school parenting to share experience if it helps.

Happy Summer, all. You're doing great.

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