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in Blog on December 13, 2020 by Meagan Francis

Meagan’s Holiday Help, Day 13: Focus on what’s not missing.

Since Clara was four years old, she and I have gone on a yearly holiday girls’ trip with my sister-in-law/sister-friend Jenna, and my nieces Luna and Ruby. We drive an hour and a half to the city, stay in a hotel, dress up, see Grand Rapids Ballet’s The Nutcracker, and then go out to eat at a nice restaurant. After seven seasons of this tradition, it’s become an ingrained part of our holiday season. Not optional.

Except, of course, this year.

In December 2020, the idea of a live performance of any sort seems like the stuff of a flashback in a dystopian novel. “Remember last year when we ate inside a restaurant?” “Remember last year when we sat in a packed auditorium with hundreds of strangers?” “Remember back when we used to…go places and do things?”

So this year, as one does in 2020, we improvised. Instead of traveling out of our area, Jenna and I took advantage of an amazing deal at a nice nearby hotel, and booked adjoining rooms. We got room service instead of going out to dinner, the girls enjoyed a swim in the empty-except-for-us pool, the adults (including our third bestie, Missy – a very welcome addition to the day) enjoyed a distanced drink around the outdoor fire pit, and instead of a live, professional ballet performance, it was knitting (Jenna), embroidering (me), and assembling gingerbread houses (the girls) in front of extremely corny holiday movies on the Lifetime network.

Of course, it just wouldn’t be our annual girls’ trip without a Christmas tree photo-op, so we all curled our hair, did our makeup, dressed up and headed down to the lobby in a masked-and-extremely-quick version of our yearly photo sesh. Then we went back to the rooms and immediately changed back into our PJ’s. I mean, why not, right?

Later, Jenna and I both remarked on how nice a night it had been: different, of course, than most years, but in many ways more relaxing. And definitely a lot cheaper.

It was nothing like it usually is, on the surface, but the most basic elements – dressing up, going somewhere outside the norm, socializing, relaxing, laughing, engaging in creativity, celebrating – were all intact.

This year, we’re all facing some version of this kind of compromise. Some of our usual traditions won’t happen at all this year. Some of them will be very, very different: opening gifts with loved ones over Facetime instead of in person; masked-and-distanced outdoor holiday get-togethers instead of the usual leisurely gatherings snuggled up on the sofa.

It’s hard, friends. And right now, it’s easy to fixate on what’s missing.

But what about what’s not missing?

Whether you opt to forego most of your usual holiday traditions, or come up with a not-the-same-but-still-fun compromise this year, don’t forget that the elements that make your holiday special: your love for the people close to you, your spirit of giving, your faith, your family, and yeah, your love for glittering baubles or sugar cookies…all those elements are still there. It’s up to each of us to craft a 2020 version of a holiday that makes the most of what we can do, while acknowledging that it’s awfully hard sometimes to give up what we can’t.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas, friends. This year, we’ll absolutely muddle through, somehow.

And maybe we can do just as much enjoying as muddling, yes? Even if this year, that means we enjoy all those things much closer to home.

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Filed Under: Blog Tagged With: Holiday Help 2020

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« Meagan’s Holiday Help, Day 12: Set yourself up for small wins.
More Than Mom: Holiday Food Traditions »

Comments

  1. Catherine says

    December 15, 2020 at 6:28 am

    Love this thought Meghan! Thanks for sharing this important reminder. “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” is truly the Christmas song of 2020!

    Reply

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#mommath #drowningindishes #summerbreakisnotreallyabreak
Happy weekend - and a big thanks to our June spons Happy weekend - and a big thanks to our June sponsors! Every month, we like to take a little time to shoutout our partners who help support the show + remind our listeners of some of the great deals our sponsors are offering. For more info, specific promo codes, and links, just search the brand name on our website, and they'll pop up in our episode show notes. We also collect ALL our active promo codes (even the old ones that are still working!) in our email newsletter - which is full of other great things we want to share with you, too. Tap on this image at the link in our bio to subscribe today. 

Meet our NEW partners this month . . .
🗣️ @connectspeech (early language support!)
💙 @appahealth (1st month of mentorship free!)
💄 @thrivecausemetics (15% off your 1st order)

And welcome back to . . .
⭐️ @paireyewear (15% off your 1st purchase!)
⭐️ @autoapprove ($100 when you refinance!)
⭐️ @outschool ($15 off your child's 1st class!)
⭐️ @mindandchild ($20 off Parenting 101 course!)
⭐️ @flowkey_com (20% off subscription piano app!)
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⭐️ @publicgoods ($15 off, no minimum!)
⭐️ @scholasticinc (books for kids of all ages!)
⭐️ @hiyahealth (50% off 1st order!)
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Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #travelingwoes #travelingwithkids #familytravelmishaps
New on the blog this week from @kiamhammond: Learn New on the blog this week from @kiamhammond: Learning About Juneteenth, As A Family.

"Like many families, mine is still figuring out how to teach our children about Juneteenth, as learning the history wasn't part of my education or my husband's when we were kids. The good news is, books written for children and families are a great way for the whole family to learn (and there are a lot of them!)."

Click this image at the link in our bio to read Kia’s book recommendations and more ways to start the conversation at home with your family.

#juneteenth #history #blackhistory #parenting #juneteenthbooksforkids #summerreading
New episode! As moms, we can be hard on ourselves New episode!

As moms, we can be hard on ourselves…and sometimes we just need to hear the simplest, oft-repeated pieces of advice and encouragement to remind us that it is all going to be OK. Join Meagan and Sarah for a reflection on eight pieces of wisdom that have carried us through motherhood struggles at every age and stage. We are offering them to you, to ourselves, and to all of our future selves in Episode 369.

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #momtruisms #momtruths #parentingadvice #motherhoodstruggles
Just a “hello” from last-week-me, who spent 30 Just a “hello” from last-week-me, who spent 30 minutes moving 25 chickens by hand from their home to the new chicken yard, because they refused to go on their own. And then an hour moving them back, because same.

It reminded me a lot of mothering a toddler, and got me wondering: what’s the most ridiculous thing mom life has brought you in the past week? -M
New episode! Have you ever fantasized about atten New episode!

Have you ever fantasized about attending a camp-like environment for grown-ups? Much about the classic summer camp experience is appealing to us (though not EVERYTHING--we could certainly do without the bugs), and the idea of simply showing up for a perfectly curated experience without any responsibility, or planning, sounds AMAZING. Listen to this fun More Than Mom to hear all of our must-have activities (like food and wine tastings, yoga, personal style consults and more!), things that would be a hard no (like swimming in the gross, murky lake or participating in corny, guided crafts) and our daydreams about creating a Mom Hour Retreat (maybe someday?)!

Find the episode wherever you get your podcasts, or click this image at the link in our bio!

#themomhour #motherhood #mompodcast #podcastsformoms #parenting #parentingpodcast #podcastlove #trypod #podcastersofinstagram #shepodcasts #summercamps #womenretreats #momretreat
New on the blog this week from @jaymesherrod: LGBT New on the blog this week from @jaymesherrod: LGBTQ+ Resources For Parents (And Anyone Who Wants To Learn!). 

"The fact is, none of us will get it right every time. Not with each other, and certainly not with our kids. But it’s important that we keep showing up and having the conversations anyway."

Click this image at the link in our bio to access Jayme's roundup of resources.

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